Russian bears are among the large and growing number of species that have been observed to learn new techniques and teach them to conspecifics. In the Russian Republic of Komi (Респу́блика Ко́ми), a scorching summer has led to a shortage of traditional food, leading bears to venture further into human habitation.
Bears dig very well. And one bear learned a useful trick, which he or she taught to the other bears. Namely, how to open a coffin. Thus a new phenomenon: Arctic bears visiting village cemeteries at night, digging up fresh(ish) graves, and eating the well-refrigerated contents.
A representative of World Wildlife Fund’s Russian branch was quoted as saying “The story is horrible. Nobody wants to think about having a much-loved member of their family eaten by a bear.”
Huh. Is that a given?
For the record: If any reader is in the position of some day having to dispose of my remains, then after transplant surgeons, research scientists, and a wig-making charity are done salvaging anything of potential use, you have my explicit permission to feed anything left to a starving bear. I could not be more serious.
Of course, the claim is that no one wants to think about a family member being eaten by a bear, and this doesn’t contradict that. But if you use as a criterion whether I would be OK with my lifeless corpse being used to save the life of a wild animal? Please know I would be.
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Oh, if it wasn’t clear: bears are real.