Let me introduce you to Joose: a 700 ml can of a 9.9% alcohol concoction loaded with copious amounts of taurine, caffeine, and other fun stuff usually found in Monster Drinks. Let me save you the math and tell you that this is equivalent to three cans of Red Bull and a bottle of Sauvignon Blanc with, it appears, benzene, xylene, and embalming fluid added.
A day late for Towel Day, I observe with equal parts glee, horror, and pain that this drink appears to be the closest legal thing to a Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster. I feel like my head has been bronzed, wrapped in a smelly wet towel, and hit repeatedly with both sides of a cross-peen hammer. I wasn’t aware there were any beverages that gave you a hangover before you got to enjoy them.
Any or all of the preceding links may offend you with Flash animations, infect you with malware, or cause vermin to crawl out of your computer vents. Normally I’d vet that kind of thing for you, but I need to go lie down somewhere dark and quiet for the next week.
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