This clock is really cool.  Even cooler than the Industrious Clock.

Seanbaby.com:  “This site is intended for people over 18, but only because kids shoot each other if they hear the word ‘fuck.’”

I heard a sound bite yesterday in which President Bush announced his administration’s new air quality standards.  In justifying the need for change, he stated that U.S. power plants are putting “tons” of pollution into the air every year.

This is one of the situations in which a politician’s statement is technically correct but completely out of scale with

reality.  According to 1999 EPA figures cited in the Public Interest Research Group‘s

paper “Lethal Legacy: The Dirty Truth About the

Nation’s Most Polluting Power Plants“, the figures for U.S. power plant annual emissions are as follows:

• SO₂: 20.4 million tons
• NO_x: 23.3 million tons
• CO₂: 6 billion tons

So yes, technically, if you are putting six billion tons of pollution into the air, you are putting tons of pollution into the air.  In that spirit, here are some comparable statements in terms of scale distortion:

“Bill Gates has tens of dollars.”

“The Earth is centimeters in circumference at the equator.”

“The human body contains tens of thousands of cells.”

“Light travels hundreds of miles per month.”

“There’s a person on the Earth.”

On the Israeli siege of the West Bank, Mr. Terje Roed-Larsen, UN Special Co-ordinator for the occupied Palestinian territories, writes that the devastation left by Israeli forces is “horrific beyond belief. … [The Jenin camp] is totally destroyed, it looks like an earthquake has hit it. … We have expert people here who have been in war zones and earthquakes and they say they have never seen anything like it. … It is totally unacceptable that the government of Israel for 11 days did not allow search and rescue teams to come.” [emphasis added]

President Bush continues to describe Ariel Sharon as “a man of peace.”

Now is the time to make yourself aware of what is really going on.  Do not just accept the U.S. spin of this being a war against terrorism.  Contact our representatives, tell them that the U.S. cannot stand idly by, let alone fan the flames, as this genocide continues.

Reference: http://news.bbc.co.uk/hi/english/world/middle_east/newsid_1937000/1937387.stm

mcgees.org will be down during the move.  Expect an outage from tonight or tomorrow morning through Sunday, perhaps Monday.  Everyone with mcgees.org email addresses will be affected.

The overpriced cable company that serves the new house has one of the most frustrating sales departments I
have ever dealt with.  I am ordering from them cable television and cable modem services.  To
get the cable television installed, however, I have to wait until the cable modem gets installed.  I
cannot even schedule an installation for the cable television until the cable modem is
installed.  This was scheduled for the 30^th of last month, but the guy never
showed up.  It was rescheduled for this morning, but the guy did not show up until 2 p.m. (Jenn waited
around for him.)  Jenn told me he had finished, so I called Ernesto (my rep) to schedule the installation of the cable television service.  Here is the conversation:

Ernesto:  Hi Josh, we can get the home installation taken care of now.

Josh:  Great!

Ernesto:   OK, how many televisions do you have?

Josh:  Two.

Ernesto:   OK.  So on the first one we’ll set up a cable box.  That’s 64
basic channels, plus 77 digital channels, plus [some number] of music channels, plus four talk radio
channels, plus ten HBO and eight Showtime.  On the other television you will just have the 64 basic
channels.  After the first month [that I'm receiving for free as a promotion], if you choose to
keep it, it will be $65 per month.

Josh:  The $65 includes the pay channels?

Ernesto:   Yes.

Josh:  And how much would it be without the pay channels?

Ernesto:   $43 per month.

Josh:  OK, so I would then have the sixty-whatever basic channels, the 77 digital
channels and the music.

Ernesto:   No.

Josh:  I’m sorry?

Ernesto:   No.  You wouldn’t have the digital channels.

Josh:  I’m trying to figure out how much it would be if I just dropped the HBO and
Showtime.

Ernesto:   So you don’t want the digital channels?

Josh:  No, I am interested in the digital channels, and I’m trying to see how much that would be without HBO and Showtime.

Ernesto:   $65.

Josh:  (pause)

Ernesto:   (pause)

Josh:  Ernesto, does that include the HBO and Showtime?

Ernesto:   Errr, yes.

Josh:  How much would it be for the service without HBO and without Showtime?

Ernesto:   $43.

Josh:  $43?

Ernesto:   Yes.

Josh:  Does that include the digital channels?

Ernesto:   No, but if you, I mean if you want to, I mean you don’t have to decide right
now, you can tell us after the first month….

Josh:  Ernesto, I’m not trying to be critical or to complain here.  I’m just trying
to find out how much this will cost.

Ernesto:   OK.

Josh:  OK.  Can I get the digital channels without subscribing to HBO and
Showtime?

Ernesto:   Of course.

Josh:  How much would it be to have the digital cable box, but not have HBO and
Showtime?

Ernesto:   $6 more per month.

Josh:  OK, $6 more.  So the total cost would be $49 per month, right?

Ernesto:   Errr, yes, $49.

Josh:  That sounds pretty good.

Ernesto:   OK.  And if you want the digital channels at some point, that would be
only $10 more per month.

Josh:  (pause)

Ernesto:   (pause)

Josh:  I thought you just said $6.

Ernesto:   Yes.

Josh:  For the digital cable box it would be $6 per month.

Ernesto:   Yes, $6 for the box.  And then if you decided you wanted the
digital channels that would be only $10 more per month.

Josh:  Why in the world would I want a digital cable box if I didn’t have digital
channels?

Ernesto:   (pause)

Josh:  One can’t be used without the other, right?

Ernesto:   Right.

Josh:  So it’s just that you guys list them separately, you need both to get the digital
channels, right?

Ernesto:   Huh?

Josh:  To get digital channels, I would need to pay $6 per month for the digital cable
box and $10 per month for the digital channels.

Ernesto:   Yes.

Josh:  So it would be $16 per month in addition to the $43.

Ernesto:   Uh, $16 … err … right.  That would put you around $60 per month.

I am very displeased with the new Anti-Drug commercial airing on broadcast television.  This spot features young people describing how they support terrorism by purchasing and using illegal drugs.  “Drug money supports terrorism”, the banner reads.

The logic is faulty; the effort is deceptive and manipulative.  I turned to Jennifer tonight and said “Well, drug money supports McDonalds hamburgers, too — and automobiles — and commercial airlines — and dental care.”  Demonizing issues does no good.

This technique is far from the exclusive property of the right.  On my side of the political spectrum, I become angry when fellow Greens proclaim that oil companies are trying to destroy the planet, for instance.

Hmmm.  Oil companies.  Jennifer turned to me and responded, “the commercial’s claim would probably be more applicable if they were talking about filling up your gask tank.”

Hello.  I am the Nielsen ratings.  A couple years ago I was Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?, if you remember.  I am now other low banalities.

“Zarusoba: Ochazuke has you have paste and hail and tea with the paddle rice which there was.”

got raisins?

The cause of death for Camus was obviously the plague; Darwin was simply unfit to continue; Einstein, to his misfortune, diced with God.  Freud slipped, Decartes stopped thinking, Galileo stopped moving.  It was clearly Luther’s diet of worms that did him in, while for Rousseau it was a contract job.  For Sartre it was nausea, for Spinoza substance abuse.  And Anselm?  A disease no greater than which can be conceived.

A requirement for a philosophy degree might be for the candidate to get each of the 100+ jokes.